“All my life, my body has been collecting stories. I was just finally brave enough to write them.”
Face, is the debut poetry and art collection which has five chapters that are thought-provoking and breathtaking reads written by Randina Sheldon.
Heart (breaking) opens the book with a brilliant poem discussing how she knew a part of her was dead inside with lines, “I was determined to revive her.” From being paralysed in current conditions fearing she will shatter, she writes, “I find myself missing parts of you that never existed,” in a gut wrenching tone that will strike a chord with the reader. There’s a braveness to her writing while discussing triggering topics of abuse in-turn seeing her slowly realise she can take her power back. With the gentleness exposed in each piece, it’s a heartbreaking yet empowering read. There’s daunting moments as the chapter progresses, but she begins to bloom. “Everyone wants a friend like me, but no one will be a friend like me,” she writes in a devastating manner. There’s some realisations knowing people mirror themselves, then the abuse in relationships is a different form of situation many are utterly terrified to explore in-turn to expose.
Mind (racing) finds the writer consumed by the future holding her attention there in-turn questioning why she can’t be present. With significant dates haunting her, she describes triggering times to the best of her abilities in a delicate manner. From being taught as an impressional child her instincts are broken while her skin was crawling and told she was safe while taking up too much space, this is another devastating part of the book that will strike a chord with the readers, especially those who resonate. Then being replaced as a child by a lover feeling the shadow of her past haunt her while protecting her younger self and being a pawn, she notes sometimes it’s better to not want to forget, or to heal. Documenting how she was taught that men don’t have to ask for permission and saying no still means they got what they wanted, she aches for peace while panicking trying to hunt it down wondering if someone cares or if they’re just nosy. . .there’s a lot to unpack for the reader in a graceful way that won’t shine away from what the writer is trying to say. Although there’s many distressed parts already, it’s an important read for survivors when someone is struggling to string a sentence together.
Body (healing) is a hard read while discussing how the writer grew up being called a liar for situations she was tragically part of, in-turn convincing herself that things didn’t happen. She begins to feel thankful that she walked away.
Soul (rising) holds a lot of value with the writer’s self worth moving the story along to find some air to breathe in a positive manner. There’s a lot of bravery and wisdom documented thus far as she was able to acknowledge things in her own time. As she diminished her story for so long out of protection for the abusers to ensure their comfort, she writes, “today is a good day regardless of how it takes me because I am choosing to set it as a good day.”
Face (me) sees the writer in her truest form as she begins to believe in herself. It’s a proud moment even for the reader to see this growth. There’s moments where she writes about falling in love, knowing she defines herself, and realises tough love disconnects us from ourselves. She learns to get comfortable with the truth that there are different sides to herself. The last part of the book is a hard hitting yet beautiful conclusion as she thanks herself for the woman she is today.
FACE is covered in raw honesty and vulnerability discussing trauma and finding self worth while rebuilding a life from the wreckage again. Accompanied by minimalist art work, it compliments the story she's telling quite well.
Randina Sheldon is a refreshingly honest writer and artist who leaves a little bit of her heart on every page. With deep vulnerability, she advocates for the voiceless and represents the hope that we can always rise beyond anything that tries to bind us. She is a die-hard cat lady, part flower, and has a laugh that can move mountains. Find Randina on Instagram, TikTok, Website.
INTERVIEW
Tell us a bit about your writing background.
I’ve actually been writing all my life. My earliest memory is writing a book in 3rd grade about my struggles in school. I talked about what helped me through in hopes of encouraging others. I even won awards and had it published somewhere. It morphed into poetry as a preteen, and then somewhere along the way, I just kinda lost touch with that part of myself. I stayed heavily into art though and pretty much always have. I got back into writing as an adult through college and being a social media coordinator. It inspired me to share my own voice and speak out about the things I was passionate about. I launched my own blog in 2015 and my writing has only grown since then.
What, or who, inspired you to start writing?
The last six years of my life have been filled with a lot of challenges and hardships. It was definitely a time of painful realizations, growth and healing. Writing on my blog gave me a place to believe in myself and that my life had purpose and direction. I started doing things that I loved simply because they gave me life, not because I had permission or approval from others, and that boosted my self worth immensely. When I started writing for myself, everything changed.
And what influenced your debut poetry and art collection 'Face'?
During those six years, I dealt with a lot of unraveling. I felt a lot of inner turbulence because my awareness of my past was growing, my body was failing, my anxiety was unbearable and I was struggling through therapy. I used writing as a way to process all of my feelings. Many things I wrote were just a way to release the weight of everything I was carrying. At the time, I saw it as journaling, venting, therapy notes and talking with God. As I began to rise out of it all, I realized what all my deepest, most private feelings in that journal could really be; a healing, redemptive book.
What do you hope people take away from your book?
In my book, I share my story for the first time of living through family abuse. My mother enabled two men to sexually assault and abuse me throughout my whole childhood. She mentally and emotionally abused me and used me for her own gain in our entire relationship. This book is about taking back my power, redeeming what was lost and coming to terms with what never came to be. This book is about healing, self love, surviving and thriving again. I pray this book lands in the beautiful hands of those who may have dealt with something similar and it gives them the strength and permission to heal and proudly take up all the space they deserve. I hope my pain comes through and it meets with theirs so they don’t feel alone. I believe together, we can give ourselves the love we never received and rise higher than we ever thought possible.
When it comes to this book, what are you most proud of?
Not letting fear stop me. Not letting the lie that my story wouldn’t matter hold me back anymore. Letting go of what anyone would think or want and do it for me. Not letting those people’s actions be my problem anymore. And finally, choosing my damn self.
What advice do you have for others who have experienced abuse?
First and foremost, you are worthy, seen, loved and valuable. Those people’s choices are not yours to bear nor are they your fault. Abuse of any kind is never ok, but I want to be clear that it happening within families IS ALSO NOT OK. This cannot be excused as tough love, affection you should be grateful to receive, done for your protection or whatever other terrible excuses these abusers use. Family or not, if you are uncomfortable, boundaries are being crossed, consent is not present and your intuition is screaming “this isn’t right”, then IT ISN’T RIGHT. PERIOD. We are not obligated to keep abusive people in our lives simply because we may share some blood or family ties. It took me many years to overcome the lie that if my own mother couldn’t love me, then no one would. The betrayal and pain runs deep, but we can uproot the damage it has caused and remind ourselves that their inability to love properly does not equate to a lack of worthiness in us, but in themselves. You deserve healthy, safe love in every relationship you are in. Don’t settle for less. It is out there waiting for you. You will find it in the hearts of the beautiful souls who will value you and treat you right, but the most precious place you’ll find it is within yourself.
And finally, what advice would you give to aspiring writers?
Don’t wait for permission to start that blog or publish that book. When we wait, we are making other people’s opinions more important than our own. We are waiting for someone to deem us worthy when that power lies in our hands. WE need to see the value in that thing burning inside of us. SHOW people what you can do and what you are worth, don’t wait to be told. Be your biggest fan and do it for you. When you run after your dreams with the mindset that no one can tell you no, you will be unstoppable.
Grab your copy of FACE, here.